State Boycotts

I went to Pittsburgh last Monday to rep a fan club pre-screening. I wasn’t that thrilled about going there alone in the first place, but figured I’d get to see it with KC fanatics, revel in my accomplishment, and head back to the hotel with a 40 to watch something on TBS. But guess what? Pennsylvania is full of fucking Quakers with weird restrictive laws!

I walked around the grocery store for 10 minutes before asking where the booze was. I was then informed that the state doesn’t allow alcohol to be sold in grocery stores. So then I called Chad and he was delighted to inform me of the following insane laws: 

- Wine and liquor are only sold in state-owned stores called “Wine And Spirits” and all prices must remain the same throughout the state. They are only open 9 am-10 pm, and closed on Sundays.

- To purchase beer a person must go to a restaurant, bar, bottle shop, or distributor.

- Beer distributors sell beer by the case or keg, but not smaller denominations of beer such as six packs.

- Six and twelve packs, along with individual beers such as 40-ounce beers, are sold at bars, restaurants, and bottle shops. A person is only allowed to purchase 194 ounces (16 bottles) of beer at a time in this manner. If you take the 194 ounces to your vehicle and re-enter the business, you can buy 194 more ounces, and continue doing so, so long as you only take out 194 ounces of beer from the store at a time.

Needless to say, I did not wind up drinking that night and I have no plans to ever return to Pittsburgh.